


Happy Birthday, Baz

by angelsfalling16



Series: 20 First Kisses [12]
Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Baz birthday 2019, Baz wearing eyeliner, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Set at Watford, SnowBaz, and Simon not knowing what to do about it, apparently i really like writing him wearing makeup, they're still in school
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-24
Updated: 2019-02-24
Packaged: 2019-11-05 02:25:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17910197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelsfalling16/pseuds/angelsfalling16
Summary: It's Baz birthday, and Simon can't keep his eyes off of him or the new makeup that he's wearing.





	Happy Birthday, Baz

**Author's Note:**

> This is my contribution to our favorite vampire’s birthday! I just barely managed to get this in on time because I didn't start it until late last night. I really like it, though, and I hope you all do, too! <3

**Simon**

When I wake up in the morning, Baz is already up and dressed, which is strange because I alway get up early to beat everyone else down to breakfast, and he’s usually one of the last people to get there. I rub my eyes and sit up. Baz has his back turned to me as he pulls on his jumper. He hasn’t noticed me yet, and I wonder if that was the point, if he was trying to avoid me.

When Baz turns around to grab something off of his bed, my breath catches in my throat as I get a better look at him. I am sure that I must still be asleep, dreaming, because from here it looks like Baz is wearing makeup, something that I am almost certain I have never seen him do.

“What are you looking at, Snow?” Baz sneers, when he notices me staring.

Definitely not a dream, I think. That’s not how Baz treats me in my dreams. Not that I would ever admit to anyone that I have dreamt about Baz before. It was only one time anyway. Maybe twice. It was no more than three times; I am sure of that. Definitely nothing that people need to know about.

“It’s your birthday.” It’s not the words that I wanted to say, but it’s what comes out. I wanted to ask Baz if he’s wearing eyeliner. It’s a very light amount, but I still notice it. It brings out the stormy grey color of his eyes.

“Thanks. I hadn’t noticed that,” Baz says drily. “Now would you stop staring at me?”

I quickly look away, my cheeks warming. “Sorry,” I murmur.

There’s silence in the room as neither of us move, and I fight the urge to look at Baz again. Finally, there’s the sound of the door closing, and when I look up, it’s to find that I am alone in the room now.

**Baz**

Simon said that he was sorry. I can’t remember a time that he has ever apologized to me before. Our rivalry is more about seeing who can treat the other the worst without both of us getting into trouble for it. He’s definitely never apologized for staring at me. And he does that a lot. Probably not as much as I find myself staring at him, but it’s still quite a bit.

I just don’t understand why he would apologize for it. Maybe he was just trying to be nice because it’s my birthday. That’s the only reason that I can think of, but it isn’t a very good one. He’s never been that nice to me on my birthday before. I strictly remember one particularly nasty fight that we got into back in fifth year on my birthday. Although, that was probably more my fault than his.

That was the year that I realized that I was in love with him. I wanted something from him that I knew that I could never have, and I was upset, on edge. Somehow, it turned into a fight when all I wanted was to talk to him, to have one nice moment with him. Of course, things have never been able to be that way between us. Right from the beginning, we were rivals, and that will likely never change.

I got up early today so that I could head down to the Catacombs before breakfast and still get there before most of the other students. I had hoped that I would be able to get out of the room before Simon woke, but I’ve never been that lucky.

I can still feel the way that his eyes felt on me as he stared at my eyes. Or more accurately, the makeup around them. I knew that people would be surprised by it, which is why I was trying to avoid Simon this morning. I really didn’t want to hear whatever horrible comment he was likely to make about it because even though I would never admit it to anyone, his opinion matters to me.

But he didn’t say anything. He wasn’t disgusted or mocking or whatever else that I thought he might be. He just seemed surprised and at a loss for words, which is nothing new for him. The way that he apologized when I told him to stop staring was new, though.

As I step out into the frigid morning, I try not to think about the way that he was looking at me. I also try not to think about the way that he looks when he is that sleepy, his eyes puffy with sleep and his hair a mess. (That’s nothing new, but it’s different somehow first thing in the morning.) I shake thoughts of him out of my head and head towards the White Chapel.

***

When I get to breakfast, Simon still isn’t there yet, and I breathe a sigh of relief. I can’t deal with his watchful eyes this early in the morning. I should have stayed in bed longer since it’s my birthday instead of getting up early.

I grab a bit of food and sit down at my usual table. I glance around the room. There are only a few other students here this early in the morning, and none of them are paying me any attention. I eat my food quickly, hoping that no one notices the way that my fangs pop out.

I’ve finished eating, and I’m just drinking some tea when Dev and Niall arrive together. I glance over at where Simon usually sits, but he isn’t here yet. Now, I’m beginning to wonder what happened to him because he’s usually gone from the room by this time. Not that I care what he does in the morning. I definitely am not missing those golden curls and blue eyes already.

“Happy birthday,” Dev says as he sits down across from me.

“Looks good,” Niall says with a nod as he joins Dev.

“Thanks,” I say to both of them with a small smile.

They were the ones who actually helped me buy eyeliner over the break when I told them that I was curious about it. They were very supportive of my decision to start wearing makeup. This is the first time that I’ve actually worn it, though. At least, it’s the first time that I’ve worn it where other people could see it. I’ve practiced putting it on several times, wanting it to look perfect the first time that I wore it out in public.

The doors of the dining hall open again, and a group of students pour in, chattering happily, a few of them looking like they’re about to fall asleep on their feet. At the back of the crowd is Simon, the rising sun lighting him up from behind.

His head starts to turn in my direction, and I turn away before he can catch me staring.

**Simon**

After Baz leaves the room and I can think clearly again, I move about the room, getting dressed and ready to go to breakfast.

The entire time, I can’t stop thinking about him, though. I’ll admit that I think about Baz more than what could be considered not creepy, but I’m usually trying to figure out what he’s plotting. Today is different.

Today, I can’t stop thinking about the way that his eyes looked, lined in a thin line of black, the grey in eyes turning darker than usual. I can’t stop thinking about how I never wanted to look away. I wanted to keep staring into his eyes forever until I had them memorized.

I shake my head to try to clear it of those thoughts. I can’t think about Baz - or his eyes - like that. I have to stop thinking about him all together.

Food will help. Eating will give me something else to think about, and it will hopefully wake me up enough to remind me that Baz is my rival and that I shouldn’t care what he looks like.

I remind myself of this the whole walk to the dining hall, but as soon as I step in, my eyes roam over to his table to find him. I can’t help it. My eyes seem to be drawn to his like a magnet.

This could be part of his plan I realize. To get me distracted by how good he looks in makeup so that he can catch me off guard. What better day to finally beat me than his birthday? That would probably be the best gift that he could ever receive.

I grimace as I go and sit down with Penny. It’s been a long time since she got to breakfast before me, but I was too distracted to get ready at a normal speed to day.

I say god morning to her, and we eat in silence. I want to ask her if she noticed Baz’ eyes, but I can’t figure out a way to ask it without it sounding weird.

“What are you looking at?” Penny asks me after a while. It’s only then that I realize that I’ve been staring at Baz again.

“It’s Baz’ birthday,” I say without even thinking, tearing my eyes away from him.

“Yeah, and it’s not the first time,” Penny says, giving me a weird look. “So, why do you keep looking at him like you’ve never seen him before?”

That’s a good question. Maybe I _haven’t_ seen him before. Not like this. Not in this way. Maybe I was too blinded by our rivalry to see him as he really is. I don’t know who he really is. All I’ve ever been allowed to see is the boy who fights me at every turn. I’ve never seen the version of him that he is around his friends or the version who suddenly decides to wear makeup. It leaves me wondering what else I haven’t seen of him just because I’ve never really looked at him.

“Yeah, but—.” I stop as Baz stands up and walks out of the dining hall with his friends, not even glancing in my direction. For some reason, I’m disappointed by this, by the fact that he doesn’t seem to pay as much attention to me as I do to him.

“But what?” Penny prompts when I don’t continue.

“Nothing,” I say, shaking my head and looking down at my food.

“Are you okay?” She asks, sounding slightly worried by my sudden change in mood.

“He’s wearing eyeliner.” I definitely hadn’t meant to say that out loud, and I’m not sure why I continue to talk about it. “He looks….”

“What?” She asks when I don’t continue. “He looks what?”

“Nevermind,” I murmur. I can’t tell her what I was thinking. She would probably take me to get my head checked. Although, that might not be such a bad idea if the rest of that sentence was going to be that Baz looks cute.

**Baz**

Somehow, I managed to make it through the day without anyone making any rude comments about my eyeliner. That was something that I was worried about and part of the reason that I haven’t worn it until now.

It wasn’t until today that I decided that I couldn’t let other people’s opinions of me keep me from doing something new. I told myself that I didn’t care what they thought. It’s my birthday, and this was my gift to me, finally doing one of the things that I really wanted to.

A few people have stopped and stared at me, but they quickly went back about their day, choosing not to make a big deal about it.

Simon is the only person who can’t seem to do that. All day, I have felt his eyes on me, even more so than usual. It’s starting to drive me crazy.

After classes are over, I decided to go back to our room for a bit, just to get a moment away from him. I tell Dev and Niall that I’ll meet up with them at dinner. They said that they got a present for me even though I told them that that wasn’t necessary, and they said that they would give it to me later.

When I open the door and step into my room, I realize that I should have gone down to the Catacombs or something because of course, I can’t get away from Simon Snow even for a minute.

“Baz,” he says when he looks up from where he is sitting on his bed. He looks like he is surprised to see me, and I begin to realize that it was only wishful thinking that he came up here to try to see me again.

“Snow,” I sneer as I set my bag down on the end of my bed.

He doesn’t say anything else, but when I chance another look at him, he’s still watching me. I sigh and turn toward the door. I need some air. Air that Simon isn’t also breathing. It’s too much for me today. All I want is to sit here and stare back, but I can’t.

“Wait,” Simon says before I make it back to the door.

“What do you want?” I ask, turning back around to find that he has gotten off his bed and moved towards me.

He doesn’t stop moving until he’s only a couple of steps away from me. His eyes flit back and forth between my eyes and my mouth, and I swear I imagine the way that his tongue darts out to lick his lips. I have to be imagining it.

**Simon**

I came to our room after class because I didn’t think that Baz would be here. I haven’t been able to keep my eyes off of him, and I just needed some time to myself to try to figure out why. But now that he’s here, I don’t want him to go.

“I, uh,” I don’t know what to say to him. I don’t know how to make him stay, and he looks like he is about two seconds from marching out of here and not returning.

My eyes fall from his eyes down to his mouth, and I realize that he isn’t only wearing eyeliner today.

His lips seem to be just a shade darker than usual. It’s almost completely unnoticeable from far away, but up close, it’s obvious that he’s wearing lipstick. I lick my own lips subconsciously, imagining what it would be like to wear that, to feel it on my lips.

“Snow?” He asks, sounding a little unsure of himself now.

I pull my eyes away from his mouth now to see what expression he’s wearing. How have I never noticed how perfect his lips are?

Except. I’m pretty sure that I have. I just never admitted it to myself because that thought means so many things. One of them being that I’m attracted to him. Another being that I want to know what his lips feel like against mine, especially now that he’s wearing lipstick.

I reach up towards his face, and he flinches slightly but doesn’t move away. I rest my hand lightly along his jaw and swipe my thumb across his bottom lip.

I tell myself that I’m only doing this because I want to make sure that the lipstick is real, that I’m not imagining it (I’m not) but that isn’t the truth. Not all of it. I also want to know what his lips feel like, even if I’ll never feel them against mine.

I wonder why he hasn’t pushed me away yet. When I look up at him, his eyes have darkened, and he looks like he is about to punch me. I take a step back and stammer out an apology, snapping out of this weird fog that took over as soon I noticed his lips.

I can’t even begin to imagine what he must be thinking right now.

**Baz**

He pulls back, his thumb dragging across my mouth again as he does, and I wish that he wasn’t stepping away from me.

“I-I’m sorry,” he says as he tucks his hands into his pockets, like he has to physically restrain himself from touching me again. He isn’t even looking at me now.

“Wait, Simon” I murmur. Because I have no self-control and because I want to feel his hand on my face again.

His eyes widen as he looks back up, like I’ve surprised him somehow. He also looks almost afraid, though, like he thinks that I’m going to yell at him or hit him. That’s the last thing that I want to do right now. Right now, all I can think about is kissing him.

I reach out and tug lightly on his arm so that he’ll pull his hand from his pocket. I slide my hand down his arm until we’re loosely holding hands. After a quiet moment where I hold very still, waiting to be rejected by him, he intertwines our fingers. He does it slowly and carefully like he’s worried that this is all a joke, that I’ll pull away and laugh at him. I won’t; this isn’t a joke. My feelings for him are very real, no matter how many times I’ve wished that they weren’t. I really like him, and I have never wanted to do anything more than I have wanted to kiss him.

I pull him closer again so that we’re standing chest to chest now.

He brings his other hand up to cup the side of my face, and I breathe a sigh of relief that I wasn’t imagining the way that he was looking at me. That I wasn’t imaging the way that he seemed to want to kiss me, just like I want to kiss him.

His thumb runs along my cheek until it brushes just under my eye. He’s staring at my eyeliner again, and I laugh lightly at the absurd idea that this is what caught his attention. If I had known that this is what would get him to notice me like this, I would have worn it a long time ago.

Finally, his eyes meet mine, and we just stare at each other for a moment. My heart races, and I can’t believe that this is actually happening. I want to lean forward and kiss him already, but there is a part of me that still thinks that he doesn’t want that, that he only likes the way that my makeup looks, so I hold back.

But then he is the one that closes the distance. He kisses me with the lightest bit of pressure at first, like he’s still worried that I’m going to push him away. Intent on wiping away any doubt that he still has, I wrap an arm around his waist and pull him even closer, deepening the kiss.

He sighs against my lips, and I smile into the kiss.

This is the best birthday present that I ever could have gotten. Nothing will ever be able to compare to this. It’s not something that I would have ever asked for because I never thought that it would be something that I could have, but it is something that I have always wished for.

I never imagined that kissing Simon was something that I would ever be allowed to do, and now that I’ve felt what it’s like, I never want to stop.

As soon as I think this, though, he pulls away and smiles that brilliant smile of his at me. The one that I’ve seen several times before but that has never been directed at me. My stomach does flips at the sight of it.

“Happy birthday, Baz,” he whispers against my ear.

“Thank you, Snow.”

“You called me Simon before.”

“No, I didn’t.”

He pulls back, about to protest, but I lean forward and kiss him again, effectively cutting him off.

**Simon**

I never could have imagined how nice it would feel to kiss Baz. Not that I have ever imagined it before. But if I had, I would have thought it would be rough and fast, more like a fight than anything else.

It was nothing like that, though. It was soft and sweet and everything that I had led myself to believe that he wasn’t.

When we finally stop kissing long enough to decide that we should go down to dinner, I frown slightly, not wanting to stop. He gets rid of that frown easily by kissing me once more. Then, he goes about fixing his hair that I may have pulled at and tangled my fingers in while we were kissing. He applies more lipstick, just the slightest amount, before offering it to me.

“No, thanks. But, um, do you think that you could put eyeliner on me?” I ask, feeling my cheeks grow warmer as I talk. “I really like it.”

“Sure,” he says, smiling at me warmly.

When he’s done, his eyes grow wide, similar to the way that I first looked at him this morning, I’m sure. Then, he’s kissing me again, like he can’t help himself. He pulls himself away again, flustered but smiling even wider now. I bite my lip to keep myself from kissing him again and making us late to dinner. I can kiss him later.

That thought has me grinning to myself. I like the idea that I’ll be able to kiss him again, that maybe we don’t have to fight all the time.

Before we can go, h has to reapply his lipstick again, and I laugh quietly.

“Shut up,” he murmurs, glaring at me. There’s no malice to it, though.

“I didn’t say anything,” I say.

“You were thinking it.”

I step closer to him until my lips brush his cheek, just beside the corner of his mouth.

“The only thing that I was thinking about was how good you look in makeup,” I whisper, and I feel him shudder slightly.

He looks at me like he wants to kiss me again, but I turn away before he can.

“Let’s go to dinner,” I tell him.

***

It isn’t until I see the look on Penny’s face, one of both shock and amusement, that I think that I should have checked my appearance.

“Are you..are you wearing lipstick?” She asks incredulously.

I grab a napkin and wipe it across my lips, and sure enough, it comes back pink. Even though I didn’t put any on, Baz’ must have come off on my lips. Leave it to him not to mention that my lips showed evidence of what we had done. I guess I don’t mind, though, because it means that he isn’t worried about people knowing that we kissed.

I still turn and glare in his direction, and he returns it with a smirk. We may have kissed, but that doesn’t mean that everything about us has changed. We’re still who we always are, but there’s no longer this pretense of hate between us.

Penny’s eyes follow mine, and she turns back to me and says, “You’re also wearing eyeliner.”

I shrug. There’s no point in trying to deny it.

“You kissed Baz.” It isn’t a question, and I’m not surprised that she managed to figure it out.

I wait for her to tell me that that was a stupid thing to do, but she doesn’t. I can’t help but smile at her then.

“It’s his birthday,” I say, like that’s enough of an explanation, and she doesn’t seem to need to hear anything else.

I smile at her again. I’m happy, and I don’t care what other people think of this new development in mine and Baz’ relationship. All that matters right now is how I feel about him.

“It is, so you should go and sit with him. I’m sure that it would make him happy.”

I smile gratefully at her. I hadn’t wanted to abandon her just because I kissed Baz, but I did want to sit with him.

“Do you want to join us?” I ask her.

“I’m good here. Now, go.”

“Thanks,” I say because I’m glad that she is understanding and that she isn’t mad about me and Baz.

I watch as Baz’ eyes light up when I sit down beside him, the tips of his ears turning pink as his friends look back and forth between the two of us.

“Hey,” he says quietly.

“Happy birthday, Baz” I reply, reaching over to take his hand in mine.

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't abandoned this series. I just haven't had any new ideas for it in a while.


End file.
